Advertisement

SKIP ADVERTISEMENT

Newsletter

The Morning

Fun, but With Structure

When socializing is stressful, rule-bound role-playing games can offer some relief.

Credit...Allie Sullberg

Growing up in the 1980s, I knew there were kids like those on “Stranger Things,” which returns Friday for its fourth season, who spent their after-school hours playing Dungeons & Dragons. I was not one of them; I played with Barbies. I figured what I was doing with dolls — acting out scenes involving homework, school dances and what happened last weekend at the plastic pool — was a far cry from the secretive world of the D&D table, with its arcane mythos and complicated rules.

It wasn’t until 2000, when an episode of the show “Freaks and Geeks” featured kids playing D&D, that I got a glimpse into how role-playing games worked. In essence, it was not so different from what my friends and I were doing with Barbies: imagining and then inhabiting characters, writing stories collaboratively, escaping reality while developing real-life social skills.

While I retired my Barbies by the time puberty hit, the universe of Dungeons & Dragons is intricate and expansive enough that it has continuing appeal for adults. In fact, it has so fully emerged from nerd-dom that it has become “something of a social flex — the antithesis of the popularity contest that was the 1990s and early 2000s, an antidote to our more basic tendencies,” Amelia Diamond writes in The Times this morning. Vin Diesel plays. So does Tiffany Haddish.

I’ve written about how socializing is weird lately. D&D offers one way to alleviate some of the anxiety. Rules govern interactions, and a dungeon master who acts as both narrator and referee enforces them. In the safety of this container, players explore, improvise, cocreate worlds.

“All of us at times feel a little inadequate in dealing with the modern world,” Gary Gygax, one of the creators of D&D, once said. “It would feel much better if we knew that we were a superhero or a mighty wizard.”

D&D and other role-playing games, improv comedy, murder-mystery parties where each guest is assigned a part in a whodunit, even escape rooms: They’re all creative, rule-bound forms of fun where scenes are created in real time and success requires teamwork and trust.

They’re lo-fi ways to socialize through performance, a relief from social media venues that insist we perform as ourselves for an audience of friends and followers. These activities give us permission to play, to drop our inhibitions and try on new personas. They let us escape into another world for a little while.

Ideas for structured fun that you recommend? Drop me a line.

🍿 Movies: Five action flicks to stream.

🎧 Audiobooks: Six picks.

👟 Exhibitions: Sneakers that were among the designer Virgil Abloh’s final projects are going on display in Brooklyn.

🎼 Opera: “The Wreckers,” a rarely staged work, premieres in Britain.

🖼 Art: Six fairs in New York City.

Image
Credit...Robyn Beck/Agence France-Presse — Getty Images
Image
Credit...a
Image
Credit...Jim Wilson/The New York Times

I’ve always been a strong advocate for eating dessert for breakfast, which is part of why Jordan Marsh’s blueberry muffins have been on my radar for a while. I finally whipped up a batch this past week, using thawed frozen berries as suggested in the recipe notes. And I’m here to report that these purple-speckled beauties are truly deserving of their 11,000-ish five-star ratings. Yes, they are distinctly cupcake-like: fluffy and sugary, and completely delightful with your morning cup of coffee or tea. But if the idea of cake before noon puts you off, serve them as a midafternoon snack or even dessert — the after-dinner kind of dessert, that is.

Image
Credit...Clockwise from left: Donato Di Natale and Clinton Meyer; Matt Anello/Blu Skye Media; Peter Lyons for Sotheby’s International Realty

What you get for $2.7 million in California: A midcentury-style retreat in Palm Springs, an Edwardian in Palo Alto or a renovated home in Sonoma.

The hunt: They wanted an Upper West Side home for under $800,000. Which did they choose? Play our game.

Low volume: One of the world’s quietest rooms is in midtown Manhattan.

Disappearing treasures: Open houses are often the scene of small-scale thefts.

Lost in translation: The language of house listings can mask all manner of problems.

Image
Meaghan Thomas and Thomas McGee at home in Louisville, Ky.Credit...Luke Sharrett for The New York Times

Still staycationing: Some travelers are opting for trips closer to home.

Makeup trends: People want a “healthy, horny flush” now.

Culinary adventures: Pairing food and wine.

Pushing boundaries?: Mullets are back, though perhaps without the shock value they once had.

Image
The goalie Igor Shesterkin is a major part of the Rangers’ success this season.Credit...Bruce Bennett/Getty Images

Carolina Hurricanes vs. New York Rangers, N.H.L. playoffs: The Rangers are hot. Down 3-1 in the last round, they beat the Penguins three games in a row to win the series. “They have the best goalie in the league this year, Igor Shesterkin,” David Waldstein, a Times reporter who has been covering the playoffs, tells us. “They are really fun to watch and are becoming a big story in New York. Lots of folks are jumping on their bandwagon.” Game 3 is 3:30 p.m. Eastern on Sunday on ESPN.

For more:

Image

The pangram from yesterday’s Spelling Bee was raunchy. Here is today’s puzzle — or you can play online.

Take the news quiz to see how well you followed this week’s headlines.

Here’s today’s Wordle. If you’re in the mood to play more, find all our games here.


Thanks for spending part of your weekend with The Times. — Melissa

Claire Moses, Ian Prasad Philbrick, Tom Wright-Piersanti, Ashley Wu and Sanam Yar contributed to The Morning. You can reach the team at themorning@nytimes.com.

Sign up here to get this newsletter in your inbox.

Melissa Kirsch is an assistant editor for Culture and Lifestyle. She is the author of the book “The Girl’s Guide.” More about Melissa Kirsch

Advertisement

SKIP ADVERTISEMENT