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Loser of the Year
Mattie Belman’s life has gone from dismal to desperate. After the loss of her acting career, her marriage, and her usual optimism, she’s back home teaching high school theater. Maybe it’ll be a fresh start.
St. Rita’s arrogant soccer coach Jillian Reed sees Mattie’s musical as an outrageous distraction for her champion players. When Jillian declares war, Mattie is far too stubborn to back down.
But as Mattie discovers there might be more to Jillian than spectacle, fire, and ego, she gets dangerously close to her iron-willed colleague. Can she avoid temptation? Or will the growing flame in Jillian’s dark eyes ignite them both?
An enemies-to-lovers, opposites attract lesbian romance about daring to take a risk, even if it burns you.
St. Rita’s arrogant soccer coach Jillian Reed sees Mattie’s musical as an outrageous distraction for her champion players. When Jillian declares war, Mattie is far too stubborn to back down.
But as Mattie discovers there might be more to Jillian than spectacle, fire, and ego, she gets dangerously close to her iron-willed colleague. Can she avoid temptation? Or will the growing flame in Jillian’s dark eyes ignite them both?
An enemies-to-lovers, opposites attract lesbian romance about daring to take a risk, even if it burns you.
ebook
Published July 17, 2024
126 people are currently reading
793 people want to read
About the author
Carrie Byrd
1 book72 followersCarrie Byrd is a California native and college professor who lives just outside Philadelphia. She loves hiking and kayaking, burritos, video games, Old Hollywood, Eagles football and Phillies baseball, teaching poetry, talking a mile a minute, and traveling around the world with her wife.
An extrovert who thrives on a stage, Carrie once won first place by crowd vote for her improvised lip sync of “Jessie’s Girl” at a packed drag brunch. She considers it one of her life’s greatest accomplishments.
Carrie’s favorite word is thistle. It feels good to say out loud.
An extrovert who thrives on a stage, Carrie once won first place by crowd vote for her improvised lip sync of “Jessie’s Girl” at a packed drag brunch. She considers it one of her life’s greatest accomplishments.
Carrie’s favorite word is thistle. It feels good to say out loud.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 162 reviews
August 19, 2024
This has been a delightful and charming romantic story that explores the unlikely pairing of two strong-willed women - theater teacher Mattie and athletic Coach Reed, forced to work together to put on a school play.
Mattie is an unemployed actress but who does not lose faith in finding her role one day. She returns to her hometown to take on a temporary job as a theater teacher at St. Rita Catholic School. In contrast, the no-nonsense Reed is laser-focused on sports and physical excellence. Apparently Jillian Reed is an arrogant former soccer player who only thinks about winning at any cost, so her sudden interest in Mattie is strange to say the least for everyone, especially Mattie.
As they are compelled to collaborate, the inherent sparks between them slowly begin to ignite, much to Mattie’s surprise. Because the way Jillian Reed behaves with Mattie is not normal, so differently than with the rest of her colleagues. Does Mattie have that much power over it, just by facing and not giving in to Coach Reed's affronts?
Religion also plays a role in the story, quite a bit actually, the school where they teach is Catholic, Jillian has a practicing Catholic family, Mattie is Jewish but agnostic.
Beyond the central romance, the book also offers a heartwarming look at the impact teachers can have on their students' lives. As Mattie and Jillian guide their young studentsthrough the play's production, they learn valuable lessons about mentorship, empowerment and the importance of embracing one's passions.
And there are several surprises that have literally brought tears to my eyes, hormones or whatever, but it has touched my soul
Ylva Publishing was kind enough to provide me with an advanced reading copy via Netgalley for an honest review
Mattie is an unemployed actress but who does not lose faith in finding her role one day. She returns to her hometown to take on a temporary job as a theater teacher at St. Rita Catholic School. In contrast, the no-nonsense Reed is laser-focused on sports and physical excellence. Apparently Jillian Reed is an arrogant former soccer player who only thinks about winning at any cost, so her sudden interest in Mattie is strange to say the least for everyone, especially Mattie.
As they are compelled to collaborate, the inherent sparks between them slowly begin to ignite, much to Mattie’s surprise. Because the way Jillian Reed behaves with Mattie is not normal, so differently than with the rest of her colleagues. Does Mattie have that much power over it, just by facing and not giving in to Coach Reed's affronts?
Religion also plays a role in the story, quite a bit actually, the school where they teach is Catholic, Jillian has a practicing Catholic family, Mattie is Jewish but agnostic.
Beyond the central romance, the book also offers a heartwarming look at the impact teachers can have on their students' lives. As Mattie and Jillian guide their young studentsthrough the play's production, they learn valuable lessons about mentorship, empowerment and the importance of embracing one's passions.
And there are several surprises that have literally brought tears to my eyes, hormones or whatever, but it has touched my soul
Ylva Publishing was kind enough to provide me with an advanced reading copy via Netgalley for an honest review
September 4, 2024
I received an ARC from Ylva Publishing via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Mattie is newly divorced and has moved back in with her parents. She’s an actress and takes a job at a high school teaching theater after going months without getting any roles. On her first day she meets the soccer coach, Jillian, and the two get off on the wrong foot.
I know I’m a bit of an outlier with this one. And while I did get to a point where I liked this, it took me a while to get into it and I had a few issues with it overall.
“Loser of the Year” is exactly why I have an issue with a single point of view in a romance. Mattie’s pov is the only one we get and I think the story would’ve been much better with Jillian’s pov as well. In the beginning, I didn’t understand Jillian as she’s guarded and she comes across as very Sue-like from Glee. So, it took a long time for me to get to a point where I liked her and understood what Mattie saw in her.
There was also a lot of telling instead of showing. The timeline is spread out and it was hard for me to buy into the relationship once they get to that point. Most of their interactions are of the sexual variety once that starts and I wish we would’ve had more conversations and emotional depth to go along with all the steamy scenes.
Another thing is something that’s more of a me thing. This is a rivals-to-lovers romance but Mattie spends all their time as rivals thinking about how hot Jillian is. It’s one of those things that bugs me because it pops up every time they interact. I know it’s not an issue for everyone, but for me if I don’t like someone, I don’t spend time thinking about their hot arms or jawline.
However, like I said above, I did get to a point where I became invested. It just came a little late. I loved the evolution and growth Mattie and Jillian go through, especially Jillian’s story. I also enjoyed the interactions with their students and how it propelled them in their growth.
“Loser of the Year” by Carrie Byrd is a debut but doesn’t feel like one. It’s clear Byrd is a talented writer and I look forward to see what she has planned next.
Mattie is newly divorced and has moved back in with her parents. She’s an actress and takes a job at a high school teaching theater after going months without getting any roles. On her first day she meets the soccer coach, Jillian, and the two get off on the wrong foot.
I know I’m a bit of an outlier with this one. And while I did get to a point where I liked this, it took me a while to get into it and I had a few issues with it overall.
“Loser of the Year” is exactly why I have an issue with a single point of view in a romance. Mattie’s pov is the only one we get and I think the story would’ve been much better with Jillian’s pov as well. In the beginning, I didn’t understand Jillian as she’s guarded and she comes across as very Sue-like from Glee. So, it took a long time for me to get to a point where I liked her and understood what Mattie saw in her.
There was also a lot of telling instead of showing. The timeline is spread out and it was hard for me to buy into the relationship once they get to that point. Most of their interactions are of the sexual variety once that starts and I wish we would’ve had more conversations and emotional depth to go along with all the steamy scenes.
Another thing is something that’s more of a me thing. This is a rivals-to-lovers romance but Mattie spends all their time as rivals thinking about how hot Jillian is. It’s one of those things that bugs me because it pops up every time they interact. I know it’s not an issue for everyone, but for me if I don’t like someone, I don’t spend time thinking about their hot arms or jawline.
However, like I said above, I did get to a point where I became invested. It just came a little late. I loved the evolution and growth Mattie and Jillian go through, especially Jillian’s story. I also enjoyed the interactions with their students and how it propelled them in their growth.
“Loser of the Year” by Carrie Byrd is a debut but doesn’t feel like one. It’s clear Byrd is a talented writer and I look forward to see what she has planned next.
August 15, 2024
Mattie Belman is a grown woman of 38, forced to move back home with her parents in her old hometown. Her acting career has stalled and she’s financially strapped so she takes a job as the theatre teacher at her old Catholic HS. There, she meets Jillian Reed the legendary coach of the girls soccer team which has won 13 state championships in a row. Of course, they clash in classic fashion in a way that stirs ire and sexy urges.
Mattie and Jillian are unapologetically themselves, annoying, strong, opinionated, vulnerable, and real. I appreciate that their friendship and relationship grow into something special that is also imperfect. The pain of hiding a love because of church/work rules is crazy but portrayed authentically. I feel their fear and anxiety but their heat is ultimately inevitable. In addition, the students add an extra layer to the story and I would smile whenever they would pop into a scene. I could definitely see this author writing good YA if she was inclined. Overall, very enjoyable read with some clever surprises and heaps of spice.
4.5 stars rounded up.
Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
Mattie and Jillian are unapologetically themselves, annoying, strong, opinionated, vulnerable, and real. I appreciate that their friendship and relationship grow into something special that is also imperfect. The pain of hiding a love because of church/work rules is crazy but portrayed authentically. I feel their fear and anxiety but their heat is ultimately inevitable. In addition, the students add an extra layer to the story and I would smile whenever they would pop into a scene. I could definitely see this author writing good YA if she was inclined. Overall, very enjoyable read with some clever surprises and heaps of spice.
4.5 stars rounded up.
Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
January 20, 2025
3.5
A perfectly wholesome enemies-to-lovers, second-chance sapphic romance! Jillian and Mattie were both really likable main characters, and their chemistry was easy to root for. While some of the secondary characters felt a bit two-dimensional (looking at you, Cynthia), the story more than made up for it with its charming humor and heartwarming moments. Overall, a pleasant read that delivers a sweet and satisfying happily-ever-after!
A perfectly wholesome enemies-to-lovers, second-chance sapphic romance! Jillian and Mattie were both really likable main characters, and their chemistry was easy to root for. While some of the secondary characters felt a bit two-dimensional (looking at you, Cynthia), the story more than made up for it with its charming humor and heartwarming moments. Overall, a pleasant read that delivers a sweet and satisfying happily-ever-after!
June 30, 2024
The tension. The chemistry. The steam. Oh my… I could not read this book fast enough even though I wanted to savor it. There are so many layers to the story that keep the reader completely engrossed every step of the way. Jillian was the perfect balance of ice queen, dominant and vulnerable, and Mattie was confident, true to herself and so caring. They were the ultimate match. Cannot recommend this one enough. How it’s a debut is mind blowing to me.
Thank you to the publisher for the arc in exchange for an honest review.
Thank you to the publisher for the arc in exchange for an honest review.
September 12, 2024
3.5⭐️ this is a story about Maddie a divorced Lesbian and former actor. Maddie is out of work and moves back to her hometown to take a teaching job at a girls Catholic High School. Jillian is a former NWSL player who quit soccer 15 years ago and is the PE teacher and soccer coach at the same girls high school. Jillian has kept her sexuality a secret from everyone she knows. And has lead her school to 15 State Soccer Championships.
I’m conflicted on this story. I started out liking Maddie and disliking Jillian then at the end my thoughts flipped on the characters. Maddie seemed shy and reserved at first and then in the end she’s the more outspoken and dominant character. In the beginning Jillian is portrayed as an ass and totally egotistical. With that being said her character wasn’t fully developed and we don’t get to see much of her POV. The story is told through Maddie’s eyes.
The sex scenes were 🥵!!! And for a debut novel it was pretty good.
I’m conflicted on this story. I started out liking Maddie and disliking Jillian then at the end my thoughts flipped on the characters. Maddie seemed shy and reserved at first and then in the end she’s the more outspoken and dominant character. In the beginning Jillian is portrayed as an ass and totally egotistical. With that being said her character wasn’t fully developed and we don’t get to see much of her POV. The story is told through Maddie’s eyes.
The sex scenes were 🥵!!! And for a debut novel it was pretty good.
July 20, 2024
Loved it !
January 3, 2025
From a distance there are a lot of reasons that Loser of the Year shouldn’t have worked, particularly as a debut. It feels a bit like someone who’d never touched a needle and thread jumped straight to attempting an elaborate, wildly-technical tapestry that would be difficult for even the most experienced artists to pull off—and then succeeded beyond measure, making it look effortless to boot. While unquestionably a romance first and foremost, LotY weaves a narrative that deftly, thoughtfully, and lovingly grapples with the complicated intersections of queerness, religion, family dynamics, and the choices that are made—or taken away—in settings that don’t allow for a person to exist fully-integrated at those points of intersection.
Our POV character is Mattie, a Jewish lesbian returning to her hometown to teach theater at a Catholic school post-divorce and lack of career success. She immediately finds herself irritated yet intrigued by Jillian, the bombastic and demanding soccer coach whose winning streak allows for arrogance. Their immediate chemistry is unmistakable but dangerous due to the morality clause in their respective contracts (yes, this is a thing!) which, in short, makes queerness a fireable offense. This forces them to communicate through a language that so many queer people have had to learn: subtle cues, hidden meanings, and careful, layered gestures that fan the flames in a deliciously old-fashioned slow-burn. Rooted firmly in Mattie’s POV, we’re also left trying to get into Jillian’s head as the tension between them builds and finally bursts in an emotional, revelatory, and immeasurably hot masterpiece of a scene. One of Carrie’s strengths is in capturing physicality and using figurative language to bring familiar concepts into sharp, surprising relief, with prose such as "the woman who’d decided to bite into Mattie’s thin life and take the best strip of it for herself" and "comprehension felt like a lick between her legs". Needless to say, the sex scenes are
Our POV character is Mattie, a Jewish lesbian returning to her hometown to teach theater at a Catholic school post-divorce and lack of career success. She immediately finds herself irritated yet intrigued by Jillian, the bombastic and demanding soccer coach whose winning streak allows for arrogance. Their immediate chemistry is unmistakable but dangerous due to the morality clause in their respective contracts (yes, this is a thing!) which, in short, makes queerness a fireable offense. This forces them to communicate through a language that so many queer people have had to learn: subtle cues, hidden meanings, and careful, layered gestures that fan the flames in a deliciously old-fashioned slow-burn. Rooted firmly in Mattie’s POV, we’re also left trying to get into Jillian’s head as the tension between them builds and finally bursts in an emotional, revelatory, and immeasurably hot masterpiece of a scene. One of Carrie’s strengths is in capturing physicality and using figurative language to bring familiar concepts into sharp, surprising relief, with prose such as "the woman who’d decided to bite into Mattie’s thin life and take the best strip of it for herself" and "comprehension felt like a lick between her legs". Needless to say, the sex scenes are
July 20, 2024
4.5 stars
I always appreciate when a talented new voice enters the sapphic literature scene. With Loser of the Year, I wasn’t quite sure what to expect, but found it to be not only entertaining and sexy, but informative as well.
The dynamics between femme, Jewish acting teacher Mattie Belman and butch, arrogant Catholic soccer coach Jillian Reed were explosive from the start. Both have returned to their home towns and are teaching at a Catholic high school. For Jillian, that was well over a decade before, and Mattie just recently after the implosion of her marriage and the difficulties of getting work as an actress.
The school setting itself was interesting for these two middle-aged characters - not only because Mattie is Jewish, but because of the Catholic church’s stance on homosexuality. This is not a story that focuses on religion at all, but it certainly impacts the characters’ journeys.
This enemies to lovers, opposites attract romance also features a butch ice queen - which isn’t usual in sapphic romances. The peeling away of Jillian’s layers was well done and Mattie - full of integrity and gumption - was the perfect melter.
Give this debut novel a read! No doubt we’ll be seeing lots more great work from Byrd in the future.
I always appreciate when a talented new voice enters the sapphic literature scene. With Loser of the Year, I wasn’t quite sure what to expect, but found it to be not only entertaining and sexy, but informative as well.
The dynamics between femme, Jewish acting teacher Mattie Belman and butch, arrogant Catholic soccer coach Jillian Reed were explosive from the start. Both have returned to their home towns and are teaching at a Catholic high school. For Jillian, that was well over a decade before, and Mattie just recently after the implosion of her marriage and the difficulties of getting work as an actress.
The school setting itself was interesting for these two middle-aged characters - not only because Mattie is Jewish, but because of the Catholic church’s stance on homosexuality. This is not a story that focuses on religion at all, but it certainly impacts the characters’ journeys.
This enemies to lovers, opposites attract romance also features a butch ice queen - which isn’t usual in sapphic romances. The peeling away of Jillian’s layers was well done and Mattie - full of integrity and gumption - was the perfect melter.
Give this debut novel a read! No doubt we’ll be seeing lots more great work from Byrd in the future.
Want to read
January 1, 2025ever since i read No Shelter But the Stars upon lee winter's newsletter recommendation, i've wanted to read more of her recs. i've read so many tame friends-to-lovers romances recently (which is not to say the trope doesn't have merit), but i've been itching for something more interesting/heated. looking forward to giving this one a go.
April 7, 2025
I have been wanting to read this book since it was published.
I had a feeling that this book was going to be great, and I was right. It is everything I was hoping for. Ever since I learned about the concept of the fire queen, I wanted to read it even more to appreciate the difference between an ice queen and a fire queen.
This book had me hooked from the very beginning, not only because of the characters but also because of the plot. Every part of it is worth reading, and the dynamic between the characters is just great. I love every single page of this book.
I highly recommend this book to everyone.
I had a feeling that this book was going to be great, and I was right. It is everything I was hoping for. Ever since I learned about the concept of the fire queen, I wanted to read it even more to appreciate the difference between an ice queen and a fire queen.
This book had me hooked from the very beginning, not only because of the characters but also because of the plot. Every part of it is worth reading, and the dynamic between the characters is just great. I love every single page of this book.
I highly recommend this book to everyone.
July 21, 2024
I really enjoyed this one. The characters are layered and very different. While Mattie is all enthusiasm and warmth, Jill is arrogant, toeing the line between mean and cold, and has some serious ice queen vibes. Those who know me will probably guess that Jill was my favorite character. The book is written in Mattie’s single POV, so we only see her through her eyes, but Byrd made sure we could read between the lines. She was so hard to like, infuriating and also very touching, with her background and the environment she evolves in. The bickering brought Mattie, who was almost in a state of numbness in her life, back to life. The progression of their relationship is very interesting and has a twist that I did not expect. It was basically one step forward and three steps back, but the relationship is very much alive and full of chemistry.Byrd brings up a lot of topics, like family, religion, and choosing between yourself and your community.
I really appreciated the teaching part of the book; the students were really endearing. It felt really warm to see teachers and students find their way. Reading this book really made me think of how I felt watching some movies in the '90s, like Sister Act 2. It was just really comforting, except it has a sapphic storyline in it!
This debut novel doesn’t feel like one; the pace is good, the writing is flowing and easy to read. I couldn’t put it down.
I really appreciated the teaching part of the book; the students were really endearing. It felt really warm to see teachers and students find their way. Reading this book really made me think of how I felt watching some movies in the '90s, like Sister Act 2. It was just really comforting, except it has a sapphic storyline in it!
This debut novel doesn’t feel like one; the pace is good, the writing is flowing and easy to read. I couldn’t put it down.
August 7, 2024
Carrie Byrd has written a real winner! The richness of her enemies-to-lovers debut romance extends beyond the basic plot and character dynamics, inviting readers into a deeper exploration of themes and emotional journeys. Loser of the Year draws its strength from its well-scripted, emotionally rich narrative and it’s quite a ride, to say the least! The journey of Mattie and Jillian goes beyond mere attraction; it becomes a profound exploration of self-discovery, connection, and the courage to embrace love in all its forms. This story not only entertains but also resonates deeply, reminding readers of the life changing power of relationships and the importance of daring to take risks—both in love and in life.
Mattie Belman and Jillian Reed are exceptionally well-crafted characters. They are designed with textured layers that make them compelling and relatable. Mattie’s transition from a hopeful actress to a disheartened teacher sets the stage for her character arc. Readers witness her grappling with self-doubt and the pressure to reclaim her passion for the arts. Her journey toward self-acceptance—and eventual love—is gradual and nuanced, filled with moments of vulnerability that allow readers to connect with her on a personal level.
Jillian, on the other hand, embodies the archetype of a strong, independent woman who has built a façade of confidence to protect herself from the vulnerabilities of life and love. Her initial antagonism toward Mattie stems from a mixture of professional pride and personal insecurity. As the story unfolds, Jillian’s character is neatly fleshed out, revealing struggles and fears that make her relatable, despite her outward toughness. The duality in their personalities creates a rich tapestry for conflict and eventual connection.
The relationship between Mattie and Jillian is steeped in the classic trope of opposites attracting, yet it is enriched by their fierce rivalry. Jillian’s initial arrogance and dismissive attitude towards the theater arts serve as a catalyst for conflict. This animosity fuels the narrative, allowing readers to witness the evolution of their connection as they navigate their differences. The tension between them is not merely antagonistic; it’s charged with an underlying chemistry that simmers beneath the surface. As Mattie begins to uncover the complexities of Jillian’s character—her passion, dedication, and vulnerabilities—readers are drawn further into the intricacies of their relationship. The gradual peeling away of Jillian’s tough exterior reveals a deeper emotional landscape that resonates with anyone who has ever struggled to connect with someone who seems different at first glance.
Resilience and bravery are recurring themes in this narrative, and it works well to support the central motif of the romance—daring to take risks. Both Mattie and Jillian are at a crossroads in their lives, confronting their fears and uncertainties. Mattie’s journey back to the stage reflects her desire to reclaim her identity and self-worth, while Jillian’s initial resistance to Mattie’s musical symbolizes a fear of vulnerability. The narrative encapsulates the idea that love often requires stepping outside one’s comfort zone and embracing the unknown, even if it leads to potential heartbreak. This inherent risk appeals to readers who crave stories that not only entertain but also challenge them to invest a little of themselves in the storytelling.
The emotional stakes in this story are palpable and reflect the complexities of human relationships. The tension between Mattie and Jillian is not merely a vehicle for romance; it heightens the exploration of self-acceptance and self-respect within the context of a wlw romance. The book does not shy away from the complexities of love and self-worth, offering a nuanced portrayal of two women navigating their feelings in a world that may not always be accepting. As their relationship develops, readers are treated to a range of emotions, from frustration and anger to tenderness and longing. The moments of realization and vulnerability—when both women let their guards down—are particularly impactful, as they reflect the universal journey of opening oneself up to love despite past hurts. The journey of self-discovery and the courage to embrace one’s true self—despite what others think—resonate with readers, making the story relevant and impactful.
Final remarks…
The appeal of this enemies-to-lovers, opposites-attract sapphic romance lies in its rich character development, thematic depth and emotional resonance. Mattie and Jillian’s journey from rivalry to romance perfectly captures the beauty of love, even when it exposes vulnerabilities so crushing, one nearly feels paralyzed by it. As these two women navigate their differences and discover the scorching passion that hisses anytime they are near, readers are reminded that sometimes, the most compelling stories are those that challenge us to take a big leap of faith, even if the landing is a little jarring. Loser of the Year is no loser; it is an exceptional debut and exceedingly worthy of praise. It promises not only to entertain but to charm, making it a must-read for anyone who loves a good romance. In fact, every book Carrie Byrd writes from here on out needs to be on one’s must-read list! This book firmly puts her on the map, proving she is one to watch!
Strengths…
Well-written
Engaging
Relatable, likable characters
Captivating story world
Rich secondary characters
A must-read
Mattie Belman and Jillian Reed are exceptionally well-crafted characters. They are designed with textured layers that make them compelling and relatable. Mattie’s transition from a hopeful actress to a disheartened teacher sets the stage for her character arc. Readers witness her grappling with self-doubt and the pressure to reclaim her passion for the arts. Her journey toward self-acceptance—and eventual love—is gradual and nuanced, filled with moments of vulnerability that allow readers to connect with her on a personal level.
Jillian, on the other hand, embodies the archetype of a strong, independent woman who has built a façade of confidence to protect herself from the vulnerabilities of life and love. Her initial antagonism toward Mattie stems from a mixture of professional pride and personal insecurity. As the story unfolds, Jillian’s character is neatly fleshed out, revealing struggles and fears that make her relatable, despite her outward toughness. The duality in their personalities creates a rich tapestry for conflict and eventual connection.
The relationship between Mattie and Jillian is steeped in the classic trope of opposites attracting, yet it is enriched by their fierce rivalry. Jillian’s initial arrogance and dismissive attitude towards the theater arts serve as a catalyst for conflict. This animosity fuels the narrative, allowing readers to witness the evolution of their connection as they navigate their differences. The tension between them is not merely antagonistic; it’s charged with an underlying chemistry that simmers beneath the surface. As Mattie begins to uncover the complexities of Jillian’s character—her passion, dedication, and vulnerabilities—readers are drawn further into the intricacies of their relationship. The gradual peeling away of Jillian’s tough exterior reveals a deeper emotional landscape that resonates with anyone who has ever struggled to connect with someone who seems different at first glance.
Resilience and bravery are recurring themes in this narrative, and it works well to support the central motif of the romance—daring to take risks. Both Mattie and Jillian are at a crossroads in their lives, confronting their fears and uncertainties. Mattie’s journey back to the stage reflects her desire to reclaim her identity and self-worth, while Jillian’s initial resistance to Mattie’s musical symbolizes a fear of vulnerability. The narrative encapsulates the idea that love often requires stepping outside one’s comfort zone and embracing the unknown, even if it leads to potential heartbreak. This inherent risk appeals to readers who crave stories that not only entertain but also challenge them to invest a little of themselves in the storytelling.
The emotional stakes in this story are palpable and reflect the complexities of human relationships. The tension between Mattie and Jillian is not merely a vehicle for romance; it heightens the exploration of self-acceptance and self-respect within the context of a wlw romance. The book does not shy away from the complexities of love and self-worth, offering a nuanced portrayal of two women navigating their feelings in a world that may not always be accepting. As their relationship develops, readers are treated to a range of emotions, from frustration and anger to tenderness and longing. The moments of realization and vulnerability—when both women let their guards down—are particularly impactful, as they reflect the universal journey of opening oneself up to love despite past hurts. The journey of self-discovery and the courage to embrace one’s true self—despite what others think—resonate with readers, making the story relevant and impactful.
Final remarks…
The appeal of this enemies-to-lovers, opposites-attract sapphic romance lies in its rich character development, thematic depth and emotional resonance. Mattie and Jillian’s journey from rivalry to romance perfectly captures the beauty of love, even when it exposes vulnerabilities so crushing, one nearly feels paralyzed by it. As these two women navigate their differences and discover the scorching passion that hisses anytime they are near, readers are reminded that sometimes, the most compelling stories are those that challenge us to take a big leap of faith, even if the landing is a little jarring. Loser of the Year is no loser; it is an exceptional debut and exceedingly worthy of praise. It promises not only to entertain but to charm, making it a must-read for anyone who loves a good romance. In fact, every book Carrie Byrd writes from here on out needs to be on one’s must-read list! This book firmly puts her on the map, proving she is one to watch!
Strengths…
Well-written
Engaging
Relatable, likable characters
Captivating story world
Rich secondary characters
A must-read
August 4, 2024
4 Stars
I’m a vibe type of reader. Loser of the Year had a different vibe from any other book. It’s an enemies to lovers, school setting, closeted situation, right? But it didn’t sit like any other books with similar tropes. One thing stands out - it has very dry humour and I love it! The other thing that struck me was Jillian. She’s very different from the usual main character. The confidence, bordering on arrogance is astounding (in a omg is she for real? Does anyone really ever feel that way?). She reminds me a lot of Sue Silvester. I am also theorising that she might have autistism? Just my theory. So, in summation, Loser of the Year is in its own league, tropes aside.
I’m a vibe type of reader. Loser of the Year had a different vibe from any other book. It’s an enemies to lovers, school setting, closeted situation, right? But it didn’t sit like any other books with similar tropes. One thing stands out - it has very dry humour and I love it! The other thing that struck me was Jillian. She’s very different from the usual main character. The confidence, bordering on arrogance is astounding (in a omg is she for real? Does anyone really ever feel that way?). She reminds me a lot of Sue Silvester. I am also theorising that she might have autistism? Just my theory. So, in summation, Loser of the Year is in its own league, tropes aside.
June 29, 2024
This book!! How can it be a debut novel 🤯
This is a well written book with engaging characters that kept me reading nonstop! My only regret is that I finished it in less than 24 hours and now have a book hangover!
Jillian is an ice queen I found easy to like., which isn’t always the case for me. It often takes time for me to warm to them. The armor she wears makes sense given her life experiences. Witnessing her resist melting with Mattie and seeing how strong the pull was to give in was exquisite. Mattie is a sweet, fun, melter that is no pushover and I appreciated this character’s knowledge of herself and awareness of the person behind Jillian’s protective persona.
I found the story so engaging, the pacing just right and tension building appropriate without being over the top. The ice queen and one bed tropes were so well done and the third act break up was believable and appropriate for the story.
If this is what Carrie’s debut novel looks like I can’t wait for what is to come from her! I would give this book 10 stars if I could!
Thank you to NetGalley and Ylva Publishing for the arc. I happily and voluntarily leave this review.
This is a well written book with engaging characters that kept me reading nonstop! My only regret is that I finished it in less than 24 hours and now have a book hangover!
Jillian is an ice queen I found easy to like., which isn’t always the case for me. It often takes time for me to warm to them. The armor she wears makes sense given her life experiences. Witnessing her resist melting with Mattie and seeing how strong the pull was to give in was exquisite. Mattie is a sweet, fun, melter that is no pushover and I appreciated this character’s knowledge of herself and awareness of the person behind Jillian’s protective persona.
I found the story so engaging, the pacing just right and tension building appropriate without being over the top. The ice queen and one bed tropes were so well done and the third act break up was believable and appropriate for the story.
If this is what Carrie’s debut novel looks like I can’t wait for what is to come from her! I would give this book 10 stars if I could!
Thank you to NetGalley and Ylva Publishing for the arc. I happily and voluntarily leave this review.
August 5, 2024
This was a fun debut from Carrie Byrd. I enjoyed Mattie and Jillian's story. This one has lovable characters, great pacing and a heartwarming end. The two MCs interact quite a lot though much of the book is Mattie's internal dialogue. I liked the evolution of their relationship through forced proximity directing the school play. It was fun and id recommend it to anyone looking for a well written HEA.
June 30, 2024
I loved it. I’m struggling a bit to isolate why…. It was clever, the characters were well drawn, it made me laugh, I loved the pacing, I loved that the writer took her time to tell her story and even tho there were bits where not much seemed to be happening, I was always learning a lot about the characters. The atmosphere was so well set, little words or asides, so well done. All of this I expect in a good book. This had something else…… 5 stars, read it for your self and see if you can isolate the elusive thing that moves a book from a 4 to a 5. For me, normally it is being made to really feel….and I did, but I feel there is more….but unlike this writer, I am not a wordsmith. Read them, not me!
September 13, 2024
I absolutely loved this book from beginning to end.
The main characters have very different personalities and took their time adjusting to each other.
I loved how Mattie slowly made an effort to figure out Jillian's personality, then wisely worked to get closer to her while, at the same time, setting boundaries to earn her respect.
This is a story where both main characters overcome separate and difficult situations, ultimately setting themselves free and becoming stronger.
The story will surprise you with unexpected revelations, steamy scenes, a beautiful romance, and genuine diversity.
Definitely a very talented writer!
Looking forward to reading her next book soon
4.6 rounded to 5 🌟
The main characters have very different personalities and took their time adjusting to each other.
I loved how Mattie slowly made an effort to figure out Jillian's personality, then wisely worked to get closer to her while, at the same time, setting boundaries to earn her respect.
This is a story where both main characters overcome separate and difficult situations, ultimately setting themselves free and becoming stronger.
The story will surprise you with unexpected revelations, steamy scenes, a beautiful romance, and genuine diversity.
Definitely a very talented writer!
Looking forward to reading her next book soon
4.6 rounded to 5 🌟
August 28, 2024
The book was okay, but it didn't quite draw me in as much as I'd hoped.
July 9, 2024
Loser of the Year by Carrie Byrd is a rivals to lovers, opposites attract, fire queen, contemporary romance, set in the world of academia.
Mattie Balman has returned to her hometown, leaving her ex-wife and flaying acting career behind. She’s not thrilled with the prospect of starting a new job, teaching theatre at the local catholic school. With her optimism at an all-time low, she’s set herself a goal to suck it up for a year.
Jillian Reed played professional soccer at a high level; she is now a high school coach. She is arrogant, narcissistic, and pure fire. There is no way she’s going to let the new theatre teacher distract her students with a silly musical. She’s there to make them win, everything else is unworthy.
When the fire queen declares war, Mattie is just stubborn enough to not back down, even when her colleagues tell her it’s foolish to stand up to the formidable Jillian.
But as Jillian’s fire gets hotter so does Mattie’s growing attraction. She starts to see behind the facade, and like a moth to a flame, Mattie can’t seem to stay away. But will it be worth getting burnt?
To start with I have to say that Jillian is one of the most unlikable protags I’ve ever had the pleasure of getting to know. Kudos to this author for basically making me hate her before I loved her. I nearly gave up hope of even liking her, then bam, and it all started with a mug. (Yes, you read right, the gift of a mug, you’ll know what I mean when you read it.) Then suddenly I started to see beyond the raging fire to those gentle glowing embers that give you all the feels. She’s deep, complex, and basically a hot mess, I love her.
What I loved most about this character is that her fire is never tamed, just redirected, falling in love actually makes her fire burn brighter. I’d love to know more about one Jillian Reed.
Mattie is a darling. I fell in love with her from the start. The story is told from her viewpoint so you really get to know her. She is stubborn, determined, kind, accepting, and fascinating. She’s been through a lot and although she’s not feeling as optimistic as usual, her sun still shines bright behind the clouds. The more I got to know, the more I loved her. She is perfect for Jillian, and Jillian knows it.
The story in this book is really good. It’s set in St Rita catholic high school for girls. The setting brought in interesting aspects and themes that were woven throughout. To summarise in order to attend or work at this school you have to at least appear to fit in a box. That boxes sides are reinforced. Basically, if you’re not cisgender, straight, and willing to align with strict catholic teachings, then the lid will be taped shut leaving you on the outside. There’s a very don’t ask, don’t tell feeling between the staff, that left me feeling very sad. It’s nearly impossible to form friendships when you are unable to be yourself. If you’re in this environment at work and home, you can imagine what impact that could have on a person, regardless of their age.
Two brilliant twists in this book turned everything I thought about interactions on their head- I had a “are you kidding me” outburst that made my frost queen wife glare at me from over her laptop!
I had so many mixed feelings while reading this story, this author made me work to understand why on earth Mattie didn’t just leave, and not because Mattie is a quitter, but because it took me a while to get why she was putting herself through certain things. And that readers, for me is the sign of a great story. But once I got it, I felt it, and it worked its way into my heart where it will now stay.
I’m going to stop there before I get into spoiler territory because readers need to experience all this hard, but loveliness for themselves.
Themes of religion, homophobia, genderphobia, and complicated family relationships.
A solid first novel from Carrie Byrd.
Arc received via NetGalley.
4.5 stars 🌟
Mattie Balman has returned to her hometown, leaving her ex-wife and flaying acting career behind. She’s not thrilled with the prospect of starting a new job, teaching theatre at the local catholic school. With her optimism at an all-time low, she’s set herself a goal to suck it up for a year.
Jillian Reed played professional soccer at a high level; she is now a high school coach. She is arrogant, narcissistic, and pure fire. There is no way she’s going to let the new theatre teacher distract her students with a silly musical. She’s there to make them win, everything else is unworthy.
When the fire queen declares war, Mattie is just stubborn enough to not back down, even when her colleagues tell her it’s foolish to stand up to the formidable Jillian.
But as Jillian’s fire gets hotter so does Mattie’s growing attraction. She starts to see behind the facade, and like a moth to a flame, Mattie can’t seem to stay away. But will it be worth getting burnt?
To start with I have to say that Jillian is one of the most unlikable protags I’ve ever had the pleasure of getting to know. Kudos to this author for basically making me hate her before I loved her. I nearly gave up hope of even liking her, then bam, and it all started with a mug. (Yes, you read right, the gift of a mug, you’ll know what I mean when you read it.) Then suddenly I started to see beyond the raging fire to those gentle glowing embers that give you all the feels. She’s deep, complex, and basically a hot mess, I love her.
What I loved most about this character is that her fire is never tamed, just redirected, falling in love actually makes her fire burn brighter. I’d love to know more about one Jillian Reed.
Mattie is a darling. I fell in love with her from the start. The story is told from her viewpoint so you really get to know her. She is stubborn, determined, kind, accepting, and fascinating. She’s been through a lot and although she’s not feeling as optimistic as usual, her sun still shines bright behind the clouds. The more I got to know, the more I loved her. She is perfect for Jillian, and Jillian knows it.
The story in this book is really good. It’s set in St Rita catholic high school for girls. The setting brought in interesting aspects and themes that were woven throughout. To summarise in order to attend or work at this school you have to at least appear to fit in a box. That boxes sides are reinforced. Basically, if you’re not cisgender, straight, and willing to align with strict catholic teachings, then the lid will be taped shut leaving you on the outside. There’s a very don’t ask, don’t tell feeling between the staff, that left me feeling very sad. It’s nearly impossible to form friendships when you are unable to be yourself. If you’re in this environment at work and home, you can imagine what impact that could have on a person, regardless of their age.
Two brilliant twists in this book turned everything I thought about interactions on their head- I had a “are you kidding me” outburst that made my frost queen wife glare at me from over her laptop!
I had so many mixed feelings while reading this story, this author made me work to understand why on earth Mattie didn’t just leave, and not because Mattie is a quitter, but because it took me a while to get why she was putting herself through certain things. And that readers, for me is the sign of a great story. But once I got it, I felt it, and it worked its way into my heart where it will now stay.
I’m going to stop there before I get into spoiler territory because readers need to experience all this hard, but loveliness for themselves.
Themes of religion, homophobia, genderphobia, and complicated family relationships.
A solid first novel from Carrie Byrd.
Arc received via NetGalley.
4.5 stars 🌟
August 15, 2024
Loser of the Year by Carrie Byrd was a fantastic account of the complex process one must face to fully embrace oneself in opposition to oppressive religious upbringing, small-town/small-mind atmosphere, and private school-encoded discrimination (read: morality clause). Mattie was a recently divorced agnostic Jew with a failing acting career in NY who headed home to lick her wounds. She accepts a temporary position as a theater teacher at a private Catholic girls' school. There, she met the closeted, arrogant soccer coach everyone seemed to bend to. An immediate attraction began, and a conflict erupted over how the students spent their spare time: preparing for a theater production or extra soccer practice. Jillian turned out to be much more than she appeared.
This story had layers, twists, passion, and heart. Spicy times ensued, and eventual love grew between the two as they navigated strict parameters and undeniable sexual tension.
It was a testament to the return on investment when risking everything you have carefully built for a chance at happiness. Maddie and Jillian also became mentors and examples for their students as they held space for the girls to accept and grow into their differences.
I absolutely recommend this book!
#oppositesattract #grumpy/sunshine #rivalstolovers #comingoutlaterinlife #religiousoppression #jewishauthor #jewishmain #catholicmain #privateschool #soccer #teacher #actor #theaterproduction #divorcedmain #smalltown #cominghome #icequeen #pennsylvania #nostrings #out/closeted #HEA #butch/femme #religioustrauma
PS This totally feels like it could be some kind of GLEE fanfic :)
I received this free ARC from NetGalley. This is my honest opinion.
This story had layers, twists, passion, and heart. Spicy times ensued, and eventual love grew between the two as they navigated strict parameters and undeniable sexual tension.
It was a testament to the return on investment when risking everything you have carefully built for a chance at happiness. Maddie and Jillian also became mentors and examples for their students as they held space for the girls to accept and grow into their differences.
I absolutely recommend this book!
#oppositesattract #grumpy/sunshine #rivalstolovers #comingoutlaterinlife #religiousoppression #jewishauthor #jewishmain #catholicmain #privateschool #soccer #teacher #actor #theaterproduction #divorcedmain #smalltown #cominghome #icequeen #pennsylvania #nostrings #out/closeted #HEA #butch/femme #religioustrauma
PS This totally feels like it could be some kind of GLEE fanfic :)
I received this free ARC from NetGalley. This is my honest opinion.
October 3, 2024
“Loser of the Year,” is a witty and delightful read. The dynamic between the two MCs, Mattie and Jillian, is truly a highlight. Their fierce personalities clash in the best way, and their witty banter had me hooked from the start. I especially loved how their interactions felt like two fires dousing each other—creating a spark that kept me engaged.
Jillian’s struggle with being in the closet among her “religious” family and colleagues resonated with me, as did Mattie’s fear of being seen as another disappointment to her parents and herself. I thought I’d relate more to Jillian since she's the closeted queer character here, but honestly, I found myself connecting more with Mattie’s journey of feeling like a loser in her thirties.
That said, I did hit some bumps in the second half where things felt just a tad rushed or lacked enough buildup, especially in some of the dialogue. But despite that, following Mattie’s POV was a joy. I also enjoyed the fleeting appearances of minor characters such Mrs. Kuzma and Mattie’s mom, Patty.
Overall, I definitely recommend “Loser of the Year” to anyone who loves strong-headed characters and has a passion for theatre. It's a compelling debut that packs an emotional punch! And I look forward to reading what Carrie Byrd has in store next!
Jillian’s struggle with being in the closet among her “religious” family and colleagues resonated with me, as did Mattie’s fear of being seen as another disappointment to her parents and herself. I thought I’d relate more to Jillian since she's the closeted queer character here, but honestly, I found myself connecting more with Mattie’s journey of feeling like a loser in her thirties.
That said, I did hit some bumps in the second half where things felt just a tad rushed or lacked enough buildup, especially in some of the dialogue. But despite that, following Mattie’s POV was a joy. I also enjoyed the fleeting appearances of minor characters such Mrs. Kuzma and Mattie’s mom, Patty.
Overall, I definitely recommend “Loser of the Year” to anyone who loves strong-headed characters and has a passion for theatre. It's a compelling debut that packs an emotional punch! And I look forward to reading what Carrie Byrd has in store next!
August 13, 2024
Loser of the Year is a solid debut that introduces a fresh twist on the typical romance narrative with a closeted, fire-queen character at its centre. Mattie, a new theatre teacher, navigates her complicated feelings toward Jillian, a brash and guarded soccer coach whose depth remains somewhat unexplored. While Jillian's character is presented as complex and loveable, the story relies heavily on Mattie's perspective, leaving some aspects of Jillian's character underdeveloped.
The story shines most in its vibrant supporting cast, including the sharply drawn students and the antagonistic school principal. These characters help elevate the narrative, providing humour and tension that add layers to the story. Although the chemistry between Mattie and Jillian is intense, the narrative could have benefited from more moments of genuine connection and conversation to balance out the scenes with physical intimacy. For me, their romance lacked the depth that might have made it truly compelling.
Overall, Loser of the Year is an entertaining and promising debut that offers a mix of humour, drama, and steamy romance. If this is Carrie Byrd's debut then I can't wait to see what she releases next.
Many thanks to Netgalley and Ylva Publishing for a copy of this novel. ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.
The story shines most in its vibrant supporting cast, including the sharply drawn students and the antagonistic school principal. These characters help elevate the narrative, providing humour and tension that add layers to the story. Although the chemistry between Mattie and Jillian is intense, the narrative could have benefited from more moments of genuine connection and conversation to balance out the scenes with physical intimacy. For me, their romance lacked the depth that might have made it truly compelling.
Overall, Loser of the Year is an entertaining and promising debut that offers a mix of humour, drama, and steamy romance. If this is Carrie Byrd's debut then I can't wait to see what she releases next.
Many thanks to Netgalley and Ylva Publishing for a copy of this novel. ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.
August 2, 2024
3.5 Stars
July 9, 2024
CHEMISTRY! And steam and wit and sass. This debut is so well-written - I was taking notes! Had a really hard time putting this one down. The author did a tremendous job weaving in a discussion of coming out in a religious (Catholic) environment and the trauma/ripple effect it can cause. There were moments that definitely made me teary. The book was a beautiful ode to teachers and coaches as well. There were times when Jillian’s fire felt like a lot but the author did a great job explaining her psychology, and Mattie was the perfect balance. I pretty much loved everything about this one- strong contender for favorite sapphic romance of the year!
Short summary: Mattie’s a divorced and failed actress who moves back home to teach for a year as she gets back on her feet. From the day she arrives at the school, Jillian is cold to her but Mattie won’t go down without a fight and the more she pushes back, the more she’s fired up.
Thanks to Netgalley and Ylva. ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.
Short summary: Mattie’s a divorced and failed actress who moves back home to teach for a year as she gets back on her feet. From the day she arrives at the school, Jillian is cold to her but Mattie won’t go down without a fight and the more she pushes back, the more she’s fired up.
Thanks to Netgalley and Ylva. ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.
July 24, 2024
Carrie Byrd may be a new star in the sapphfic universe, she shoots right into the stratosphere with this debut. It’s sharp, funny, vulnerable and so very addictive!
I received an advance copy from Netgalley and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
Mattie Belman was supposed to be a successful actress by now. And happily married. Instead, she is newly divorced with no actual acting success to her name. Defeated, Mattie returns to her hometown to live with her parents and start a new job as a drama teacher at a private Catholic school for girls. A very strict Catholic school, that is. Well, that might be a slight challenge for an out and proud Jewish lesbian like Mattie. To top that off, behind the scenes the school seems to be run by the very successful but equally arrogant soccer coach Jillian Reed. Why oh why does Mattie feel an instant pull towards this aggravating woman? To speak with Carrie Byrd’s/Mattie’s own hilarious words: ‘the outcome seems inevitable, like death, taxes, or homophobic politicians getting caught on gay-dating apps.’
Mattie is a powerhouse. She might not think so herself, but she is determined right from the start to not let Jillian overpower her like some lame chicken. The way she immediately challenges the infuriating head coach is something to be admired and cheered on with dances and pompoms! Mattie stole my heart right from page one. She is anything but sure of herself or her future, but she values herself enough to stand up for what she feels is right, for her and her students.
Now for Jillian, it took me a good while to actually like her. Byrd does an impeccable job in introducing her as the narcissistic villain of the story who only cares about her own success. The tension between Mattie and Jillian is delicious. The story is told from Mattie’s POV, so you only get glimpses of Jillian’s suppressed attraction, but these little peeks behind that wall of pure arrogance are everything. Through Mattie’s eyes we get to watch those concrete walls crumble one tiny piece at a time.
Mattie’s witty self deprecation is hilariously honest. Her self talk made me grin more than once. She can look at her own thoughts, twist her way of thinking into something agreeable and call bullshit all in the same sentence. It makes her very human and very, very funny.
The parallels in the dynamics between the musical characters and between Mattie and Jillian are spot on. Mattie plays a very important role in the lives of some of her students. Showing them, struggling against the catholic school’s restrictions, that being different is ok and being different doesn’t mean you can’t live a happy life or find love.
While Mattie and Jillian grow closer, Jillian is weighed down by her families expectations and the fear of not being good enough if she would live her life authentically. At the same time she tries to teach the musical kids about standing up for themselves and believe in their abilities. My heart ached for Jillian and for Mattie as well. To see the woman she loves struggle like that? Heartbreaking. If only Jillian could take her own lessons to heart…
I could write on and on about how good I think this book is, but you know what, go read it and let it speak for itself. One thing is absolutely true though: Carrie Byrd is one new author to watch out for!
I received an advance copy from Netgalley and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
Mattie Belman was supposed to be a successful actress by now. And happily married. Instead, she is newly divorced with no actual acting success to her name. Defeated, Mattie returns to her hometown to live with her parents and start a new job as a drama teacher at a private Catholic school for girls. A very strict Catholic school, that is. Well, that might be a slight challenge for an out and proud Jewish lesbian like Mattie. To top that off, behind the scenes the school seems to be run by the very successful but equally arrogant soccer coach Jillian Reed. Why oh why does Mattie feel an instant pull towards this aggravating woman? To speak with Carrie Byrd’s/Mattie’s own hilarious words: ‘the outcome seems inevitable, like death, taxes, or homophobic politicians getting caught on gay-dating apps.’
Mattie is a powerhouse. She might not think so herself, but she is determined right from the start to not let Jillian overpower her like some lame chicken. The way she immediately challenges the infuriating head coach is something to be admired and cheered on with dances and pompoms! Mattie stole my heart right from page one. She is anything but sure of herself or her future, but she values herself enough to stand up for what she feels is right, for her and her students.
Now for Jillian, it took me a good while to actually like her. Byrd does an impeccable job in introducing her as the narcissistic villain of the story who only cares about her own success. The tension between Mattie and Jillian is delicious. The story is told from Mattie’s POV, so you only get glimpses of Jillian’s suppressed attraction, but these little peeks behind that wall of pure arrogance are everything. Through Mattie’s eyes we get to watch those concrete walls crumble one tiny piece at a time.
Mattie’s witty self deprecation is hilariously honest. Her self talk made me grin more than once. She can look at her own thoughts, twist her way of thinking into something agreeable and call bullshit all in the same sentence. It makes her very human and very, very funny.
The parallels in the dynamics between the musical characters and between Mattie and Jillian are spot on. Mattie plays a very important role in the lives of some of her students. Showing them, struggling against the catholic school’s restrictions, that being different is ok and being different doesn’t mean you can’t live a happy life or find love.
While Mattie and Jillian grow closer, Jillian is weighed down by her families expectations and the fear of not being good enough if she would live her life authentically. At the same time she tries to teach the musical kids about standing up for themselves and believe in their abilities. My heart ached for Jillian and for Mattie as well. To see the woman she loves struggle like that? Heartbreaking. If only Jillian could take her own lessons to heart…
I could write on and on about how good I think this book is, but you know what, go read it and let it speak for itself. One thing is absolutely true though: Carrie Byrd is one new author to watch out for!
July 18, 2024
(Rounded up from 3.75)
I enjoyed this and it was a really fun debut. I loved that we have a Sue Sylvester-esque character but closeted as one of the main leads. It was a promising premise and a character type I hadn't seen before (tentatively, I'll say a fire queen rather than ice queen?) but it fell just short of my expectations.
Unfortunately, while Mattie is very well fleshed out and we spend a great deal of time in her head understanding her, we don't get much of the same for Jillian, who is egotistical, funny (or so Mattie claims, I don't really see much of it), sweet (once again, as claimed by Mattie), and loveable (again, Mattie says so). You see my problem: a lot of telling but not enough showing for me for the central couple. Were this a contemporary sapphic book about Mattie, I wouldn't care so much, but the romance is clearly central in this book, which requires me to be invested in the relationship and I just wasn't.
I think this book could have deeply benefited from adding scenes where Maddie and Jillian interact and just... talk. Jillian is already so closed off but the fact that every interaction they have is charged with sex prevented me from getting to know them as people and how they establish a friendship and fall in love.
That said, this was still a solid debut and a fun read. The side characters are all great, from the horribly homophobic principal of the catholic school to the kids participating in the musical. Everything is solid except the main pairing for me. I suspect I may be in the minority because many people would simply enjoy the many spicy scenes of them together but I prefer to get a bit deeper (heh) in terms of characterization and how people fit together rather than how great the sex is in romances so I was not fully invested.
That said, an enjoyable read and a fun premise! I look forward to reading what Carrie Byrd does next because this is really a very good debut and I have high hopes for subsequent books.
I enjoyed this and it was a really fun debut. I loved that we have a Sue Sylvester-esque character but closeted as one of the main leads. It was a promising premise and a character type I hadn't seen before (tentatively, I'll say a fire queen rather than ice queen?) but it fell just short of my expectations.
Unfortunately, while Mattie is very well fleshed out and we spend a great deal of time in her head understanding her, we don't get much of the same for Jillian, who is egotistical, funny (or so Mattie claims, I don't really see much of it), sweet (once again, as claimed by Mattie), and loveable (again, Mattie says so). You see my problem: a lot of telling but not enough showing for me for the central couple. Were this a contemporary sapphic book about Mattie, I wouldn't care so much, but the romance is clearly central in this book, which requires me to be invested in the relationship and I just wasn't.
I think this book could have deeply benefited from adding scenes where Maddie and Jillian interact and just... talk. Jillian is already so closed off but the fact that every interaction they have is charged with sex prevented me from getting to know them as people and how they establish a friendship and fall in love.
That said, this was still a solid debut and a fun read. The side characters are all great, from the horribly homophobic principal of the catholic school to the kids participating in the musical. Everything is solid except the main pairing for me. I suspect I may be in the minority because many people would simply enjoy the many spicy scenes of them together but I prefer to get a bit deeper (heh) in terms of characterization and how people fit together rather than how great the sex is in romances so I was not fully invested.
That said, an enjoyable read and a fun premise! I look forward to reading what Carrie Byrd does next because this is really a very good debut and I have high hopes for subsequent books.
July 26, 2024
I received an ARC from the publisher via NetGalley.
It's always such a pleasure to read a strong debut!
Matty returns to her parents' home after her divorce from her ex-wife and a string of auditions in Hollywood that didn't yield anything. She's in her late 30s and feels lost. Her mother gets her a temporary teaching position in the local Catholic high school as the theater arts teacher. It's a difficult fit for Matty who is Jewish and who seems to have received the ire of Jillian, the soccer team coach who's won 13 consecutive state championships for the school. The two develop a combative relationship in which Matty refuses to be intimidated by Jillian, unlike the rest of the school. Then the principal informs her that Jillian will be working along side her as co-director of the school's musical.
The enemies-to-lovers, butch-femme romance was a pleasure to read. The writing was strong, especially for a debut; the character development well done; and the author successfully used the issue of religion as a plot point conflict. It's unusual and so refreshing to read about a Jewish MC whose family, while not religious, is notably culturally Jewish. This is rare in Sapphic lit.
I look forward to more from this author and highly recommend this book.
It's always such a pleasure to read a strong debut!
Matty returns to her parents' home after her divorce from her ex-wife and a string of auditions in Hollywood that didn't yield anything. She's in her late 30s and feels lost. Her mother gets her a temporary teaching position in the local Catholic high school as the theater arts teacher. It's a difficult fit for Matty who is Jewish and who seems to have received the ire of Jillian, the soccer team coach who's won 13 consecutive state championships for the school. The two develop a combative relationship in which Matty refuses to be intimidated by Jillian, unlike the rest of the school. Then the principal informs her that Jillian will be working along side her as co-director of the school's musical.
The enemies-to-lovers, butch-femme romance was a pleasure to read. The writing was strong, especially for a debut; the character development well done; and the author successfully used the issue of religion as a plot point conflict. It's unusual and so refreshing to read about a Jewish MC whose family, while not religious, is notably culturally Jewish. This is rare in Sapphic lit.
I look forward to more from this author and highly recommend this book.
July 6, 2024
I think this is a very well written book that just isn't for me. I found Jillian a very frustrating character and her ego made her annoying to me not charming so I really struggled with seeing the connection between the two main characters and what Mattie actually saw in her. Then there was the aspect of what happened in the past and Jillian's struggle with religion that I found... Awkward? Which I think is very unfair of me but as someone who kinda went through similar feelings as Jillian at the similar age but managed to actually be happy with who I am rather than hide it this felt like seeing an alternative version of myself and it made me vaguely annoyed. And so many people in this book are hung up on things that happened when they were 18, like god you're goddamn adults!
So not a book for me but I think it could work for many many people who are able to get into the romance of it all. And the kids were pretty adorable.
So not a book for me but I think it could work for many many people who are able to get into the romance of it all. And the kids were pretty adorable.
August 5, 2024
When I was a quarter way through this book I already decided it was a favorite. This was everything I love in a sapphic romance novel all in one. We have slow burn tension, complex and layered adult (38 & 40) characters, instant chemistry, funny dialogue that volleys smoothly, and (at least initially) enemies to lovers. And to top off, a story about being true to yourself at the risk of everything you know. That last bit resonates with me especially. I grew up in a conservative religious household so I felt a certain kinship to Jillian and her struggles. I understand this was a debut novel from this author and I must say I’m already looking forward to whatever her future works may be.
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